The Girl in the Harley Store

Sometimes brief encounters have a lasting impact. We were in Pennsylvania on vacation and on our way back to our home base in Hershey after a day trip to Philadelphia. We had spent the day exploring some of the birth sites of our nation, places like Independence Hall and the site of Ben Franklin’s home and print shop. We were 30 minutes away from “home” when we decided to take a detour to visit a Harley Davidson store.

I had zero interest in owning a Harley but a great interest in buying a t-shirt. A friends of ours was a big Harley guy and collected T-shirts. We thought it would be nice to grab one from one of the many Harley stores in central Pennsylvania. We found a store and after taking a few moments to orient ourselves made our way past the bikes and upstairs to the T-shirt section.  After several minutes of browsing and debate we selected a shirt and made our way to the register. The clerk was a pleasant young woman who seemed to be in her very early twenties.

In the course of our conversation we shared that we were from California. Her eyes lit up (apparently not a lot of Californians visit Harley stores in central Pennsylvania) and she asked us where in California we lived. She did not know where Orange County was so I told her we were about 20 minutes from Disneyland, which impressed her even more. She told us that she hoped to be able to go to California some day. The way she said it led me to believe that she wasn’t sure she’d ever make it out west, that she understood such a trip would likely be forever beyond her financial reach. She mentioned that the farthest she traveled was Hershey, about 10 miles away.

I was struck by how different our lives were. We lived in a beach town in Southern California with theme parks, beaches and mountains and Hollywood within easy driving distance. She lived in a small town where the single theme park in nearby Hershey was a big deal. We had traveled more and further in a week than she had in her life time.  She could only dream of traveling. She lived in a part of the country where jobs were scarce and times were hard while we lived in an area of immense wealth.

As we drove away I thought about these differences. we lived in the same country and spoke the same language but lived completely different lives. What was normal and common for me was unfathomable to her. We consider ourselves to be normal middle class people yet to her we seemed incredibly wealthy. Our brief interaction reminded me of how easy it is to forget our blessings and privilege, how easy it is to lose sight of the opportunities afforded us simply because of where we were born and the talents God has given us. I have more to be thankful for than I often realize.

- Bart

A Facebook Debate with a Good Outcome?

Facebook has gone nuclear. It is always blowing up about something but in the last few weeks it has gone nuclear. Everyone is at someone’s throat about someone’s political post. Immigration and deportations, Travel bans and Circuit court rulings, protests and counter protests have all served as fodder for raging political fires.

Reading the posts and the comments (I know, I know, NEVER read the comments) one thing is overwhelmingly clear. No one is listening. Lot’ s of people are talking, but no one is listening. I have yet to read a single comment saying, “Why do you feel that way?” or “Tell me more, I would like to understand where you are coming from?”

I decided to counteract this trend a few weeks ago. A Facebook friend I have not seen since high school made a liberally leaning comment on another friend’s post and I decided to respond. Instead of posting a comment, I sent him a message-

You are on the left and I am on the right. We are both writers. I am wondering if you would be interested in a genuine dialogue on some of the issues. I would love to engage with someone who disagrees with me without either side attacking the other.”

Over the course of the next several days, we dialogued. We exchanged emails on taxes, health care and media bias. We found a few areas of agreement and many more where we saw the world from completely different perspectives. Neither of us changed our minds.

The most important thing we agree on is that both of us love our country and want what is best for it and that neither of us wants to destroy it. Beyond that, we are still friends.

Something to think about the next time you are tempted to type out an angry comment. If you’re not willing to dialogue in private, you probably shouldn’t say anything.

- Bart

thanks for reading and sharing. Comments and questions are welcomed, and personal messages are especially welcome!

A Different Road to Success

Everyone wants to make a lot of money. Most people think the path to success runs through college and is paved with textbooks, term papers and scantron forms. This belief has led countless young people to invest their parent's life savings, and much of their future earnings, in financing a college education. All who do this get a piece of paper with their name on it, trailed by a couple of very expensive letters (the most appropriate of which are B.S.)

Many are soon surprised to learn that those letters are not worth the paper they are printed on. Their dreamed of earnings don’t materialize. Their dream degree in their chosen field either turns out not to be the degree employers want or a degree that is wanted by only a few. In either case the opportunities available to them often provide only a living wage. They have a lifetime of debt in front of them and wasted years behind them.

I have received applications from a number of these people. When I post an ad for a position in my office I without fail receive several resumes from desperate college grads searching for a job. There is a degree of sadness when I delete their emails. They may have a college degree but they lack the skills and experience needed to work as a receptionist in a medical office. Over-qualified, mis-qualified and unemployed.

A few weeks back I met a young man who took a different path yet embodies the success for which so many young people strive. He is 29, single, self-employed and financially secure. His job pays well, enough for him to buy a home in Huntington Beach in a zip code with a median home price of $762,000. By most measures of financial success he is doing well, very well for his age.

He is successful, yet he had never attended college. Not one class, seminar or night course will be found on his resume. He has no formal business training, yet he makes over $100,000 a year.

He is a pool man.

He has been cleaning swimming pools for 13 years, since he was 16 years old. His father is a pool man and he learned the trade from him, how to monitor chlorine levels, remove algae and repair heaters and filters. After a few years working with his father he struck out on his own, acquiring customers and building his business.  Before long he was making a good living. Young and debt free, he was able to put a large portion of his earnings into savings, eventually enough for a down payment. He is a success.

He is a reminder that the road to success does not always go through college. Something for students and their parents to remember!

- Bart

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Suffering for Christmas

I have seen a lot of suffering lately.

The week before Christmas a patient I had known for over 15 years was sent home from the hospital on hospice. His bone marrow cancer had left his bones and attacked his liver. It was too late for the bone marrow transplant he had been waiting for and too advanced for any hope of a response to any treatments. Within 24 hours of going home he was confused and difficult to arouse. He died less than a day later.

I had another patient go home on hospice Christmas eve. The combination of metastatic cancer and heart disease had left her too weak to fight. As it was possible this Christmas would be her last she chose to spend it at home. She still holds out hope that she might regain enough strength to resume curative treatments but there are no guarantees. Hers was a sick Christmas.

On December 23rd I made a house call on a third hospice patient. This patient has an incurable lung infection. We thought it would have taken her life months ago but she has hung on, her body refusing to give up on the unwinnable fight even though her mind did long ago. Walking across the room can be an ordeal for her. The disease has destroyed so much lung tissue she has no respiratory reserves remaining.

All three of the patients and all of their families suffered this Christmas. The emotional and physical pains were real and intense. In addition to their hospice status they had something else in common, the lingering question, “Where is God in all of this?”

Modern society, and at times the Christian church within it, seems to have the view that suffering has no rightful place in this world, that its presence is evidence that God either does not exist, does not care, or is weaker than is claimed. The thought that a good God could allow suffering, or worse, ordain it, makes no sense to us.

When Christians do talk about suffering it is usually discussed as a temporary stop on the journey to a positive destination. This is often true. My own life is evidence of this reality as my struggles with chronic pain and anxiety have helped soften and mold me into a more patient and caring man. What is seldom discussed or acknowledged in the Christian faith is the suffering that endures, the pain that never fades and is a permanent part of someone’s life.

It is seldom discussed but it is readily evident in the world around us. Whether it be from conditions such as fibromyalgia or Lou Gehrig’s disease or oppression under hateful governments there are millions of people around the world who wake up each morning in the same state or worse than they were the day before, with no end in sight and no hope for better days. What is God’s purpose for these people? Why do they continue to suffer when there seem to be no further lessons to learn? Why does not God rescue them from their pain, allow them to go on the next life now?

These questions returned to my mind this week as I was reading through the book of 1 Peter. Peter was writing to Christians in Asia who had experienced severe persecution under the Roman emperor Nero. Many Christians had been killed or tortured and the ones that remained lived in fear of the same. Peter wrote to educate and encourage these people in the truths of God.

The most astonishing aspect of Peter’s letter was his attitude about suffering. Peter wrote that, for these people at least, suffering was not something to be temporarily endured but rather a calling to be accepted. Peter told the people of the eternal nature of their call, of the profound blessings that awaited them in the next life and the certainty of them receiving them. He reminded them that Jesus was called to suffer on their behalf and that they were called to suffer as well. He then made the remarkable point that the manner in which people endure prolonged suffering is a powerful testimony to others.

As I read his words I realized that they are in profound contrast to what many Christians seem to believe. When suffering comes we spend our days praying for relief, looking for a lesson or hoping for a way out. Peter’s words remind us that none of those options may apply in this lifetime. At times the only purpose for our suffering is that God be glorified by the manner in which we endure it.

Not a truth I particularly like, but a truth I need to accept.

Bart

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How to, and Not to, Apply for a Job

We needed a new receptionist. Receptionists are the first voice patients hear on the phone and the first face they see when they come into the office. They can be the difference between a positive or negative impression of not only the practice but of the doctor on a personal level. A bad hire can lead to damage that takes months to overcome. With these reasons in mind I began the search process with a sense of dread. I did not want to make a mistake. Again.

I decided to attack the problem on two fronts. I called a local temp agency with whom I had worked in the past and also put an ad on Craig’s List. The resultant flood of resumes and applications revealed a lot of how, and how not to, apply for a job. Here are some of the lessons learned.

1-Career Objective statements on resumes are often stupid and can kill an applicant’s prospects.

I do not know who teaches medical assistants how to compile a resume but someone has been telling people to say really stupid things at the top of their resumes. Here are some of the opening goal statements-

“Obtain a Administrative position where utilizing extensive skills and knowledge will help people.”

“My objective is to one day rise up in a company and expand my knowledge, strengths and interests in the different things I do in life, also to learn and grow from my mistakes which I consider stepping stones in life for a better future.”

2-Many applicants seem to be seeking a job other than the one for which they are applying.

I received resumes from applicants stating they wanted to “improve sales” or “work in a hospital” setting as well as  others that did not make any mention of the position for which they were applying. In a competitive market applicants should take the time to edit their resume so it appears they are applying specifically for the job in question.

3-Grammar and spelling matter

One applicant was very interested in a "postion" with my company. She didn’t get it. She didn't get the position either.

4-Many applicants don’t understand they need to do what the boss wants.

In order to make the process more efficient I decided to conduct all of my initial interviews via Skype or FaceTime. There are times when I can tell someone is not a good fit within just a few minutes. It seems unfair to both of us to make someone drive to my office for what may be a brief interview. FaceTime seems to be a great way to conduct a brief initial screen and respect other's time. I called one applicant and asked if we could schedule a brief initial interview on FaceTime. She replied, “I would rather not do that.” The result was that she did not get interviewed at all.

5-A little homework goes a long way.

In our area our office is the top rated practice on Yelp. I have an office website and Facebook page as well as this personal website/blog. Less than half of the applicants I interviewed had taken the time to read about me or my practice and as a result were unable to give specific reasons why they wanted to work for me. They came across as interested in any job, not for this specific job. As I was looking for someone who believed in our vision and philosophy of care these people placed themselves at a significant disadvantage.

6-Your past is not a secret.

One applicant sent over by the agency gave a good interview and we were ready to hire her. Then her background check revealed she had multiple felony counts pending for stealing prescription pads and writing fraudulent prescriptions. Another applicant had judgments against her for breach of contract. In an internet era a person's background is only a few clicks away.

7- Do it right and you may get more than you expect.

The person we hired had none of the above problems. Her career objective on her resume was “To obtain a position in a company where my experience and skills can be utilized to better improve patient satisfaction.” As our primary focus is quality care and service, this statement showed she shared our values. Her resume emphasized her experience in medical offices in a clear and concise manner.

When I called and asked if she was available for a FaceTime interview her reply was perfect. She told me she thought that was a great idea and that she would be available that afternoon. When I “called” her, she was dressed nicely, had appropriate hair and makeup, and was ready with a smile and pleasant demeanor. She had done her homework and knew who we were and what our values were. She had read our reviews on Yelp and told me she liked our emphasis on customer service.

Finally, her social media presence showed someone who was mature and committed to family. Everything about her was positive and appealing. When all of this was combined with the talents she revealed when she came in for a working interview it is not surprising that I hired her right away at a salary above what she requested.

She comported herself like a winner and won the job. She made me feel like a winner as well.

Bart

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