All three of them wore masks, the 97-year-old patient and both of her children, who were in their sixties. The daughter was especially masked, wearing an N95 over her cloth mask. Their abundance of caution made me self-conscious when I walked in bare faced.
I said my hellos and then addressed the mask disparity. “You don’t have to wear masks if you don’t want to,” I said, hoping to make them comfortable.
“But there is still a mandate in California,” replied the double masked daughter.
“Would you like me to wear one?”
“No, that’s okay.”
“Have you all been vaccinated?” I asked.
“We have all gotten both shots.”
“Well then, according to the CDC, we don’t have to wear masks!” I said, then continued, “I think there is value in seeing faces. I joke around a lot, and I need to see if people are smiling or if my jokes fall flat!” I went on and shared the story of the time I spent 90 minutes with a patient from eastern Europe and ended the visit with a gentle gibe. I could not see his face to know that my joke fell flat, so flat that he left me a 1-star review on Yelp. “I like seeing faces!”
Slowly, and cautiously, they dropped their masks. They smiled. It was wonderful.
There were many smiles during the visit, and both sides of the communication. The most beautiful smile was on the face of the 97-year-old. Demented and unable to care for herself, she sat in a wheelchair in the corner, asleep for most of the visit. Towards the end of our time together she woke up, and her children introduced me to her. Her smile spoke volumes. It told me that she was still present, that she still was capable of joy and happiness. Without a word I saw the value of her life and how, even with her faculties fading, she was a blessing to those around her. Involuntarily, I found myself smiling in return.
The mask debate continues, stirred by combinations of fear, defiance and a CDC that turns on a dime. I do not know the politics of masks and have been as confused as a lay person about their true effectiveness. Like many others, I was so accustomed to mask wearing that it seems strange to not have one on.
What I do know for certain is that I love smiles more than ever before.